The Original Theories

The Issue: ...if they were going to replace Daniel... what about Nyan? The dude from "New Ground"? I mean, he was supposed to be assiting Daniel anyway... so he would have had the training required [unlike Jonas], would have known the team.... - Karasu

The Answer: My theory is that both Nyan and Ferretti got stuck in the same closet at the SGC. ;) Which absolutely ticked Ferretti off, since he thought that he was finally free of the 5x5 when Nyan opened the closet door; only to find that he has a new alien closet mate when Nyan closed the door behind him. There's still an ongoing search, but its all on the hush-hush cause its kinda embarrasing for Hammond. - Artifuss

The Issue: [immediately following the above] *vbg* I agree, *nodnod*, and perhaps Martouf is in there too? Because I refuse to believe that he died in Divide and Conquer, the directors seemed to confuse who was supposed to be where... Anise was supposed to die. - Karasu

The Answer: Martouf is definitely alive. The Tok'ra have a sarc that the Tau'ri don't know about yet, so they threw Marty in to get rid of all those pesky holes. They had shown Sam a symbiote and called it Lantash (sp?). Tell me... could Sam really tell the difference from one snake to the other? So Marty is actually livin' on Nem's planet with Aris Boch and Maybourne. They're poker buddies. The one problem is, Marty and Lan (the Dream Team) are *good* at the game. They win every time. - Artifuss

The Issue: [Cold Lazarus]...on a side note, Sara tells Jack she knows he has to go back thru the Stargate. Now that would have made a nice conversation to have shown, at least an abbreviated one. And I know if that was me, I would have gone with Jack and 'Charlie'...but she just lets them go... - Huntress

The Answer: Sara was contacted by Thor after a lot of nagging from Loki. A few days before, as Charlie was the uber-human that Loki couldn't help but drool over, he cloned the child with the use of a stray hair. What Loki didn't realise is that Charlie is a very stubborn 10 year old (he takes so much after his father) and would not quit pestering the Asgardian Trickster. Sara was beamed up Scotty style and was placed as guardian of her newly revived son. Loki got all the samples he could possibly want so mother and son are now living in Minnesota in a cabin not far from Jack's, where Charlie is training to be "the best hockey player ever" (his words). - Artifuss

The Issue: The events of "Past and Present," which follows immediately after Sha're's death in "Forever in a Day."

The Answer: It was a mirror universe, but TPTB didn't tell us that. They let us think it was *our* Daniel...in our reality, Daniel kept his distance from Kera (or Keira or whatever), discovered his feelings for Jack, got Kasuf's blessing and he and Jack lived happily ever after....and for those of you who don't see the slash, just substitute Sam for Jack....cause I can see Sam/Daniel.... - Huntress

The Issue: [immediately following the above, regarding the Sam/Daniel comment]

The Answer: I can... and can't. lol! At times they are waaay too much in brother and sister mode. Like when Daniel *accidentally* walked in on Narim and Sam's kiss. ::Aww! I thought that moment was so cute!:: I'm still waiting for that episode where Jacob tells Sam and Daniel that they were seperated at birth. ;) That one's coming up soon, right? - Artifuss

The Issue: Karasu's wishlist... AsgardClone!Jack re-enters for some kickass adventures.

The Answer: He teams up with (a now-reformed) Harry and the two weed out the evil governmental officials who want to shut down the SG program and/or turn it over to the NID... - The Huntress

The Issue: Karasu's wishlist...Hell, all those "where are they now?" characters come back and get to join in.

The Answer:Feretti and Nyan return from their sabbatical in Norway (as a couple no less -G-), Molly teaches Jack the fine art of water gun fighting, Fred cleans up his act, moves off the street and becomes one of Daniel's many assistants...oh and Freya/Anise--Jack gets to do experiments on *them* -VBG-... - The Huntress

The Issue: HUGE SPOILERS IN THIS PARAGRAPH DON"T LOOK!!! XD ahem. Right. I hope you know what you're getting in for. ... Janet is going to die. *hits head on desk and screams* ARGH! I love her, damnit! - Karasu

The Answer: It seems as if the writers subscribe to the "Good ones die young" religiously. Only way to explain the deaths of: Marty, Narim, Government guy Joe... OMG! Sam must have slept with Janet!! It's the Black Widow curse all over again. Not even women are safe from it! - Arifuss

The Issue: And without her[Janet], who the hell am I supposed to slash Carter with? - Karasu

The Answer: The Lunch Lady maybe? You know there's gotta be something behind the blue jello. *And* it could help improve the cafeteria food... maybe make room to bring in a five star chef? - Artifuss

The Answer: [continuing on spoilers thread...] The lunch lady?? (Laughing myself silly here)...and yeah, we write the fanfic...who says Janet has to die? And a Janet can always come thru the QM to be with Sam during her loss.

As far as new characters, they can make for fun fic plots, like a jealous Jack. Just what was Daniel doing with the new Colonel on base Monday night when he was supposed to meet Jack at Jell-O wrestling?

And what about a fretting Daniel, wondering why Jack has been studying hieroglyphics with the new linguist at lunchtime...in her office??

Plots to ponder...
Huntress

The Issue:that SG-1 are having orgies every night - mentioned in passing in a random email, jokingly. ^_~

The Answer:They are?? Aww geez, I knew it! That's why Teal'c has been walking with a crooked gait; why Daniel has had that stupid grin plastered on his face; why Sam has been muttering, "yes! they're still living!"; why Jonas has been reading the "Joy of Sex"...and it also explains why Jack signed up for a group membership at Madam Mahalia's Sex Emporium....amazing the things you can learn from your lists.... - Huntress

The Issue: Carter's black widow curse. [tag to #10 in the J/D list]

The Answer: Oh! So that's what's happening. Somewhere down the line Sam had a curse put on her where only the strong one will survive to be able to please her. Anyone else to fall in love with Sam, either male or female will parish. Despite Jack being the brave colonel that we all love, he was close but still not the right match to beat it. And Daniel was too much like a kid brother to Sam. So Teal'c with all that strength of his was able to banish the curse, leaving Teal'c and Sam to live happilly ever after. :0D

Why was Sam cursed? Throughout her life she's always had to be a strong person. While at the academy, she was challenged to an arm wrestling contest and since she was still pissed from her break up with Jonus, she consented. And obviously she won. Out of spite the sore loser, who happened to dabble a bit in magic, placed the black widow curse on her; with a claus that no man on earth would be strong enough to break the curse. That bastard! Fortunately he never thought she would meet a tall, dark, and sexy alien.

Um... TMI?
Arti

Thor's Answering Machine (a.k.a. the theory that developed while wondering why Jacob was the only one called to help in Meridian...) We got Thor's answering machine. He's busy but will return our call as soon as possible."

This is Thor, Supreme Commander of the Asgard Fleet. I cannot come to the communication device at the moment, but will return your communique as soon as I can. If this is Loki, do not bother leaving a message. Call Freyer and he will deal with it. If this is the O'Neill clone, I am sorry but we cannot improve on your physique; it must develop on its own. If this is Daniel Jackson, you were an ascended being and have more knowledge then I, so deal with whatever it is. If this is Samantha Carter, you seem to know everything, so you too must deal with whatever it is. And if this is you O'Neill, I can no longer assist you unless you join the 'I need the help of the Asgard' club in which membership is 234 klar a solar year. Speak at the bleep....

If this is Master Teal'c of Chulak and you require my assistance, please press 1 and the call will be routed to me immediately. For I know that if *you* are asking for assistance, then it must be a true honest-to-me emergency and I will respond. If this is General Hammond, you are in charge and should be able to deal with it. If this is Senator Kinsey and you leave a message, I shall beam you where no man has gone before. If you are the person who came up with the idea for Meridian, you too shall go where no man has gone before. If you are one of the producers, please be aware that I am available at any time, even for a cameo appearance. If this is Pete, no, I cannot protect you if the Black Widow curse is set upon you. If this is Anubis, the Star Wars Emperor look-a-like/Darth Vader sound-a-like contests have been switched to Thursday the nineteeth.

Transcription of Thor's answering machine message courtesy of the Huntress.

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